FASHION vlogger Adobea Obeng will never forget the moment she was diagnosed with cancer, aged just 31.
“My first thought was ‘I have a son, I can’t have cancer – who will bring him up?’ I freaked out.”
More devastating still, Adobea was told the disease was incurable.
But as she tried to come to terms with the news, there was a further, unexpected challenge when she struggled to find people to talk to and information about cancer that felt relevant to her.
“When you think about cancer, you don’t really see a face like mine,” she said. “But people who look like me are living with cancer every day, and sometimes dying from it”.
Now, four years on, the 35-year-old from Romford, is thankful to be on treatment that is keeping her stage four breast cancer in check. She is backing a Cancer Research UK campaign to help more people like her survive by giving regularly to Cancer Research UK.
And she is further spreading the word about cancer in young people, through the fashion Instagram and YouTube channels she set up after getting through the worst of her treatment, @itsdivinestyle
Adobea’s road to diagnosis was not a straightforward one. In 2016 she found a grape-sized lump in her breast but was advised by a doctor that she was young, so it was ‘probably nothing’. By the following year, the lump had grown to the size of a tangerine. She again saw a GP but was told as there was no pain, there was nothing to worry about.
Then in April 2108, with the lump even bigger, Adobea started to experience back pain. One day on her way to work, she developed a piercing pain in her chest and was finding it hard to breathe. A colleague took her to a pharmacy and staff called an ambulance. However, doctors said it was muscular skeletal pain and she was sent home with painkillers.
Over the next two days, Adobea deteriorated further, dealing with excruciating pain – every breath was agonising. An ambulance was called and this time she insisted on a CT scan.
The following day Adobea was called back to the hospital. She convinced herself she had blood clots. Instead, the consultant told her she had a 7cm mass in her breast, nodules in her armpit were affected and she was sent for a biopsy.
“Cancer had never entered my head – that was an old person’s disease. And I didn’t feel ill, I had no pain, so I was sure it wasn’t cancer,” she said.
But a couple of days later, doctors confirmed she had metastatic ER2 positive breast cancer. “It was the worst day of my life,” she said.
Within two weeks Adobea started chemotherapy treatment at Queen’s Hospital, Romford
“I think that’s probably the hardest thing I’ve ever had to go through. Chemo is no joke,” she said.
Adobea had four rounds of chemotherapy and is now on hormone treatment to keep the cancer at bay.
As she started her treatment, Adobea found it difficult to talk to anyone about her illness – partly because she didn’t want them to worry about her and partly because she was in denial. She didn’t know where to turn for support.
“When you think about breast cancer, you don’t really see a face like mine. But people who look like me are living with cancer and die from cancer,” she said.
After treatment, Adobea, who jointly runs a recruitment agency, set up a fashion YouTube channel @itsdivinestyle
Normally it’s chatty and upbeat and colourful. But in May this year, she decided to tell her emotional cancer story.
“It’s just so important to talk about it. Cancer doesn’t discriminate – black, white, brown, age, height, weight, health nuts, people into their fitness. There’s no one single face of cancer – anyone can get it.
“I’m generally upbeat and fun – a good time girl. But life affects me just like everyone else. And being vulnerable and open will help bring awareness.
“Since talking about my cancer, I’ve had so many kind words that have really touched my heart. So many people thought they were alone.
“Cancer is just a part of who I am now. There are so many people living with cancer now, including secondary cancer, and living relatively normal lives.”
Her son, Fabian, now 13, knows his mum has cancer and that it’s incurable.
“He gave me a lot of strength to fight when things were really bad during treatment. He was instrumental in keeping me strong and positive.
“Now we talk about it, and I try to be as honest as possible. But I make sure it’s not the centre of our world. It’s not a day-to-day conversation – our lives are pretty normal.”
Adobea’s great grandma had cervical cancer and didn’t have the treatment options available to her.
“Research is leaps ahead now,” she said. “And I’m grateful to have options she didn’t have.
“We’re all human, and more so those of us living with a prognosis that’s not that great. We do have days when we feel absolutely rubbish. But you deal with the low times – that’s normal. But you look at the positive things in your life rather than dwelling on the things you can’t control.
“I don’t know how much time I have so I’m going to enjoy it. Tomorrow isn’t guaranteed.“
That’s one of the reasons she’s urging people to give regularly to Cancer Research UK to help fund long term research projects that could drive new breakthroughs.
Life-saving cancer treatments are made by months and months of trialling, testing and learning. But monthly progress in research, needs monthly donations.
With around 36,000 people diagnosed with cancer every year in London*, Adobea message is: to save lives tomorrow, Cancer Research UK needs the public’s support today.
She said: “Research into better treatments has given me more precious time with Fabian, and my loved ones.
“But this wouldn’t be possible without the dedication of scientists who are relentlessly striving towards new discoveries and milestones month after month. This vital work needs our support.”
“If I had been diagnosed with cancer ten or twenty years ago, the outcome might not have been the same for me and that’s down to research.
“By making a monthly donation to Cancer Research UK, people could help give hope to many more families like mine and invest in long term research that could save lives for generations to come.”
Thanks to the generosity of its supporters, Cancer Research UK was able to spend over £150 million in London alone last year on some of the UK’s leading scientific and clinical research.
While 2022 marks the charity’s 20th anniversary, its history dates back to the founding of the Imperial Cancer Research Fund in 1902. During this time, its work has led to more than 50 cancer drugs used across the UK – and around the world – from widely used chemotherapies to new-generation precision treatments.
In fact, drugs linked to the charity are used to treat more than 125,000 patients in the UK every year – that’s 3 out of every 4 patients who receive cancer drugs on the NHS.
Lynn Daly, Cancer Research UK spokesperson for London, said: “One in two of us will get cancer in our lifetime,** but all of us can help beat it. As we mark our 20th anniversary, we’re reflecting on how far we’ve come thanks to supporters like Adobea. From proving the link between smoking and cancer to laying the foundations for modern radiotherapy, our scientists have been at the forefront of cancer research for 120 years.
“Monthly donations make a huge difference to advances like this, because they allow us to plan for the future – and the more we can plan, the more projects we can fund to unlock more of cancer’s secrets. So we hope people will give regularly to the charity, if they can.
“We’re working towards a world where we can all live longer, better lives, free from the fear of cancer. Beating the disease is a long game, but it’s one that – together – we will win.”
Donate monthly to Cancer Research UK at cruk.org/donate
