Online dating has become incredibly popular and is a common way to meet others. People use it for finding more than a one-night stand or the occasional hook-up – contrary to what popular stigma might suggest. It is being used to form long-lasting relationships with the people they meet, with some even resulting in marriage. If marriage isn’t your end game, that’s fine, but regardless of what you’re hoping to get out of it, there are a few things you need to keep in mind. Whether it’s your first time, or you’ve dabbled before and come out unsuccessful, here are 6 tips for using an online dating website.
1. Be Realistic
Setting realistic expectations for yourself as well as being realistic about who you are, is important. There are tons of different apps out there, and different apps attract different sorts of people with different relationship goals. You should take a look at a review of the top online dating apps to find which one aligns with what you want to get out of your online dating experience. Some sites promote more casual dating, while others strive for more meaningful and deep relationships. However, all of them require you to be realistic about who you try to make a connection with, too. Inaccurate photos that have been edited, or are old, are not that uncommon, and neither is catfishing. Hiding behind a screen enables people to lie because you don’t have anything to go by. This is why it is always important to meet up with someone in a public place before things get too serious. At the very least you need to video chat with them. If someone seems too good to be true, make sure that they are actually real. Never commit to a relationship with someone you haven’t met, or haven’t at the very least had a video call with.
2. Be Yourself
Catfishing isn’t just about fake photos of other people. You can use your photo and still be a catfish. Don’t lie about your life and don’t try to be someone you aren’t. Upload up-to-date and unedited photos that actually look like you. The worst thing is meeting someone who looks nothing like their photo, so why would you do that to someone else? Your profile and how you speak to people shouldn’t be about vanity, it should be about who you actually are. Starting a potential relationship in a dishonest way only leads to further problems and an eventual breakdown in that relationship. If one thing is a lie, they’ll constantly be wondering what else is a lie.
3. Learn to Accept Rejection
Rejection is tough. No one likes it and wants to deal with it, but as soon as you learn to accept rejection as something that happens on an online dating platform, it makes things a lot easier. If you match with someone, chat for a while and they still don’t want to go on a date with you, that’s fine. The connection might be plutonic for them, or you just don’t have a meaningful connection at all. Don’t get caught up on looks. Getting defensive and being unkind by responding with every disrespectful thing you can think of won’t do you any good. The same goes for someone you match with and they never respond. Don’t leave a bunch of messages, because you can’t take them back.
4. Don’t Pressure Yourself
If it’s been a while since you dated, it can be tough getting back into things. It’s important that you remember to not put pressure on yourself. Don’t have it in your mind that you HAVE TO find yourself a partner. This makes you desperate and you choose someone because they’re there, rather than someone because they’re the best person for you. Putting pressure on yourself causes you to stress and settle or stress and find no one. Take things slow and get to know each other as people, not just as someone you might date. Become friends and then partners. If you can do that, then you might have a shot at a good and healthy relationship.
5. Ask Those Important Questions
It’s important that you know what the other person is trying to get out of using online dating. If you are on the same page, then it makes things a lot less complicated and easier. Also, if you’re thinking about being intimate, it’s important that you ask a few questions, especially about birth control, STDs, etc. Be mature and have an adult conversation.
6. Make Time for Dating
Lastly, it’s important that you make time for dating. In this busy world, we often tend to lose track of things and be consumed by work. Make time to form meaningful relationships with the people you meet online, in the real world.
Online dating should be fun. It is an easy way to meet people in the comfort of your own home and to establish common ground before meeting up. Take note of these 6 tips to have a successful online dating experience.