WHEN Dan Ridge’s son got a hoverboard and mastered it instantly, Dan thought he’d jump on and show him how dads handle it.
However, Dan fell flat on his back and injured more than his pride – his fall led him to a shocking bowel cancer diagnosis.
Dan, from Bromley, had been going to the toilet ten times a day for the last year, often passing blood. But he passed his symptoms off as stress, eating spicy food or having one too many beers.
“I’d let it become my normal”, he said.
Following the fall, Dan went to see a physiotherapist and filled in a form, which highlighted his toilet frequency and other symptoms.
He sought medical help and in March 2023, he was told he had a large tumour in his bowel.
The diagnosis was frightening but what really got to Dan was being told he needed an ileostomy bag.
“That scared me more than the diagnosis,” said Dan, who is married to Rowan, 44, and dad to Thomas, 15 and Jacob, 12, as well as step-dad to Amber, 17 and Farris, 14.
Thankfully, Dan is now well and, grateful for the treatment he had, he is taking part in Cancer Research UK’s Race for Life next month (May).
Dan was diagnosed with stage 1, grade 3, bowel cancer on March 30th. He left hospital after the diagnosis but 12 hours later he had to go to A&E with a blocked bowel which made him very unwell and caused a panic attack. He then remained in hospital and had the stoma operation on April 1st.
“It was an horrific start which added to the trauma of the bag’” he said.
Later that month he began chemotherapy treatment, using capecitabine and oxaliplatin, two drugs Cancer Research UK helped develop. This reduced the size of the tumour by nearly 50%, meaning it was operable and he wouldn’t need radiotherapy.
In August Dan underwent surgery to remove the tumour. Thankfully, although it was large, it was early stage and hadn’t spread. But while things were improving physically, emotionally things got a lot darker.
While friends congratulated him for being rid of the tumour, he was traumatised about the bag.
“Outwardly, I was quite vocal about the cancer, talked to friends about it and made poo jokes.
“But inwardly, it was different. The bag had become a symbol of the cancer and changing it daily felt like reliving the trauma.
“Not knowing whether it would be permanent pushed me into depression and suicidal thoughts,” he said.
“I filled my calendar, stayed social and tried to stay positive. I went to my brother’s wedding, to Glastonbury, and played my best season of softball. But later I realised it was also a way to avoid facing deeper emotions.
“As well as being cancer-free, there were other things to be thankful for.
“I was young for bowel cancer, so they gave me strong treatment, but I kept my hair. I had long hair and a top knot and that stayed, which felt like a nice little win at the time,” he said.
But behind those moments, he really struggled with the unwanted ileostomy bag.
Thankfully Dan found his way to therapy and support groups, which helped enormously.
“They were life-saving. I learned to be kinder to myself, developed coping techniques and slowly began to improve,” he said.
One of his mood-boosters was to blast out the Rocky theme tune to pump him up to change the bag each day.
After healing and another round of chemo, doctors discussed if it would be possible for him to live without the bag.
Conflicting scan results left Dan devastated, but his surgeon repeated the examination and confirmed the reversal could go ahead.
“On 16 July 2024 I woke from surgery to find the bag gone. It was the happiest moment of the entire journey,” he said.
Recovery was tough but he slowly improved and got stronger.
Dan, Director of Rhodium Creative, celebrated his 40th birthday, surrounded by friends and family. And he finally told his children the full story.
“They knew I was ill, but I didn’t want to worry them by telling them about the cancer.
“I told Jacob that falling off his hoverboard started it off and saved my life. He takes credit for it now!
“I’m still processing everything, but each day feels lighter and I’m grateful to be able to get on with life again,“ he said.
Dan and a team of family and friends called Motley Poo, are taking part in Race for Life in Regent’s Park on May 9th.
Dan, now 41, has advice for other men reluctant to seek help if they have any dubious symptoms.
“Basically – don’t be a bloke! There is no harm in going to the doctors and getting any symptoms checked.
“Just because you’re younger, it doesn’t mean cancer won’t happen to you.
“Don’t go to Dr Google and look for the answer you want to hear. Go to the GP. It will give you peace of mind. And if there is a problem, going early might just save your life.”
